The Fortune Cookie

12 June 2008 ~ Two For the Price of One

(Updated)
2:46 AM crept in the midnight air while the promise of another blistering hot-ass day tomorrow lingers in the early summer morning dew. Just moments ago, I found myself tossing and turning for reasons I couldn’t quite put my finger on until it hit me, just as it had so many times in the past when I used to write for the fulfillment of my own desires and not that of others (i.e. school, work, or the sick pervs who appreciate new poems on the men’s restroom wall).

I lay in bed a little while longer questioning the real need to get up at this hour just to peck away at the keyboard jotting down my random thoughts, but as I lay there, still wide awake, more thoughts began flowing fluidly through my mind about all the things about which I could write. I struggled then and even up until now on how best to start, because quite honestly I always like to have a nice introduction to catch my reader’s attention (note singular again) and hopefully carry them through to the end. Alas, I had no good, clear introduction other than to explain why in the hell I’m up at this hour in the first place.

***

With the big tomato scare going around the country right now, I was a little freaked out when, after ordering in twice in the past week, I remembered I had eaten their tomatoes. Then this week, just a day or two afterward, I started feeling the aches and general nausea. On Tuesday of the week, I awoke at my normal time of 3AM, and felt about 50% of my usual stamina, but I knew I had to make the long commute into work because I had to set up a few things for my students and their instructor, who would be briefing form an offsite location. I was barely there mentally and felt like I was not far from meeting my maker. Eventually I got everything set up then headed home. Not longer after I got home, I discovered my temperature was 104.9F (isn't the "F" more or less understood in American culture? God forbid someone misinterpreted it as Celsius...) and I started taking Advil to bring it down. Don’t get me wrong, fevers are good because that’s the body’s mass production of white blood cells to fight the infection or illness, but fevers over 102 typically are not safe!

Anyway to make a long story short, my temp continued to reach the 104 range and it was a bit scary because I hadn’t seen my body temp rise that high since 2001 when I had a severe case of food poisoning. Fortunately, my doctor called in some meds for me and Nate went to pick them up and one of our neighbors was the pharmacist working that night. She recommended I take Tylenol and Advil every few hours to keep the fever low and it worked! It worked until I went to bed, then the damn thing crept in again and I began shivering around 3AM. We all know what the shivers mean: it means that our body heat is so damn high but for some dumb reason we feel cold! HOW ODD?! Nate awoke around 4:30AM and checked my temp; wouldn’t you know it was 104.7 again.

I swallowed some more pills and eventually the fever subsided to a safe 102 and eventually the mercury returned to the shadows of the 98-degree mark. People have always said that you fry brain cells when your temp is above 104 degrees, which brings me to me to my next point, the real reason why I couldn’t sleep and needed to write.

***

Life is too short not to enjoy who you are or who you were designed to be. I am who I was designed to be. I’m a smartass as best, I tend to have a mind that isn’t quite as clean as a baby’s unused diaper, I frequently interpret life around me as humorously as possible by twisting the morbid details of our infinitesimal existence to make them funnier and I do this primarily to make others’ life more enjoyable and bearable.

Every once in a while, someone comes along and reminds me that I should not be doing this; that I am in the wrong; that I talk too much or too loudly and that my jokes and style of humor is not appreciated. Naturally this hurts my feelings because while I do enjoying making others laugh, the greater reward is generating laughter from others.

With that said, I have this final thought to add: I’ve got much on my plate right now between a fulltime work and school schedule, my position as president of the board of directors for our HOA and other obligations. Last year I was dealt a tough blow when my older brother was killed and then a month later his unborn baby died. Now, my 17 year old half-brother was recently diagnosed with cancer (noted in my last blog), so to all those out there who still don’t like (or cannot handle) my style of humor, I think I’m holding up pretty well to keep up my front and if you “can’t hang” then I would recommend you find the door upon which you entered my life and don’t let it hit you in the butt on the way out. I have changed enough for people in my life but I refuse to lose my own self-identity anymore than I have already.

***

Actually (and to end on a lighter note), I wanted to post in last Sunday when the most amazing thing happened. Nate and I stopped by to visit the new Wegman’s supermarket that opened that same day and boy was it a madhouse! As far as the eye could see, there were hundreds of cars and millions of people from all around. I thought they were just giving away free food! After spending an hour trying to make our way into the parking lot and then searching for a parking space, we finally made our way into this colossal supermarket that I had always heard so much about over the years. Having not eaten yet, we decided to grab a bite to eat once we got inside; now this isn’t like your typical supermarket with the standard deli area. Quite the opposite indeed. This place has several restaurants and deli shops from which to choose, and eventually after perusing the many varieties, I opted for Chinese and he elected the same.

We took our plates upstairs and sat at a small table just near the balcony overlooking the center atrium and from the opposite end of the room was a small live string quartet, consisting of a cello, a base and two violins. Hey! If I’m wrong about the music then who’s going to tell? This is my blog and I’ll remember it the way I WANT. :)

Anyway, after we ate our Chinese, then we were left only with the two fortune cookies sitting lonely on the table, just staring at us as if to ask, “Well, aren’t you going to devour me too much like you just did our distant cousins?” So I handed Nate the two cookies and he put them behind his back, mixed them up and then asked, “Which hand?” I picked the right hand, so he handed me that cookie and he took the other (obviously, because that’s the way this dumb game works).

He ate his cookie then read his fortune, and I began eating mine and reached for the fortune only quickly to realize I was reaching for not one but two slips of paper. “How odd,” I thought but still I didn’t say anything to Nate. Instead I asked for him to read his fortune after which I proceeded to read the first of mine and waited for his response, then I said, “Oh wait, let me read my second one now.” We both laughed and were just stunned in amazement because neither of us has ever seen one with two fortunes.

What’s more, both of these fortunes that I received seemed to provide comfort and answers to the many prayers and burdens that have been really heavy on my heart lately. In fact, I’ve been struggling very much with some of the matter and although I tend to maintain an incredulous view on fortune cookies, as they are purely a novelty item, I still found it amazing actually to receive these two messages. Usually fortunes cookies today are not true “fortune” cookies but mere statements taken directly from Captain Obvious’ Stardate Log, such as “The sun will rise today and provide warmth over a cool sea.”

Before opening our fortune cookies, we actually joked about what ours would say.

Mine read:

1. Your are a traveler at heart. There will be many journeys. (Yes the typo was there….maybe it’s an indication I’m traveling back to a foreign country!)
2. A golden egg of opportunity falls into your lap this month.

...If only this could possibly mean the Mega Million Jackpot prize was well within my grasp I'd rest a little easier tonight!

Until next time…
NK

A Wild and Distant Shore

4 June 2008 ~ Lost and Found

It has been far too long since my last entry and I really have no excuse other than to say that I have been busy. Every time I had intended to set aside time to write, or every time I was truly inspired and felt compelled to jot down the current happenings, something of greater importance would always steal the moment.

Since 4 December, Nate and I celebrated our third anniversary on 31 December, but don’t get too excited. This past New Year’s Eve was nothing to write home about! Regardless of how many attempts we made to get into the city, at midnight we found ourselves stuck on an underground metro with our friend, Wade. We spent the last few hours of the year trying to no avail to reach our other friends who were waiting for us in one of the local bars. At one point we got off the train and decided to take a taxi because it would be faster. Nope! No cab would pick us up and so that’s when we headed back to the train and waited for it move toward the city. After the train started rolling, it then broke down for 20 minutes and somewhere between the dark lights and the long quiet wait, 2008 snuck in unceremoniously.

What’s funnier is Wade’s partner, Alan, spent the last 2 hours waiting for us outside in the frigid air. He was freezing and could not get in the club because he didn’t have the required tickets; our friend Barb (who was working inside) was holding our tickets in the club and we were supposed to call her and then meet in the entrance once we all got there. The club entry was by ticket only and they were sold out well in advance. Alan didn’t know Barb from a hole in the wall, plus he didn’t have his cell phone on him or his wallet; these items were secured safely in the pockets of jacket, which was locked safely in the truck of his car right beside his car keys.

To put the icing on the cake, around midnight, Verizon Wireless decided it would be very entertaining to shut down their cell phone towers. No calls could come in or go out so there we were, trying aimlessly to make our way downtown, with no way to reach anyone and no idea where Alan was by this point.

Finally, after 1AM we all managed to meet up and find our way upstairs. We stood at the bar for 20 minutes trying to get the bartender’s attention to order a drink, and of course the drink, which consisted of a full glass of ice, coke and two drops of Crown, was $10. Nate ordered a Red Bull and vodka, which was comprised of about the composition.

Anyway, the past few months have been rough to some degree, what with full time school and work, a promotion which came with a new position working in DC, and we can’t forget this long drawn out Democratic primary season. However, as of last night that fight has ended and the person with the most votes did not go on to win the presumptive nomination.

I realize that by this point in my blog most people will have stopped reading save the two or three people in my life who actually have more time on their hands than me. However, for those who have continued reading, I’ll continue with the revelations.

Most of you may remember I lost my older brother last year, and he was my only full biological sibling. On 23 May of this year, on the eve of my 29-plus-tax-birthday, my dad called me to report that my younger (half) brother had been diagnosed with cancer that was discovered in his chest, neck and lower arms. David is only 17 but the good news, if any, is that it is Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, and it was caught in stage 2.

Let’s see, what else is new? There has been so much going on during the past few months. About three weeks ago, two of my closest friends I had from when I lived in Germany came over to visit. Severine and Jörg spent a weekend with Nate and me, and of course we did some sightseeing and went out a couple nights. Anyway, I’m just rattling on about what’s transpired over the course of the past few months rather than ranting on about what I think or how I feel today, which after all expressing one’s personal views is the sole purpose of blogs! I felt like I owed it to my reader (note: singular) but I’ll revert by next time, providing that’s not another 6 months away.

***
A few months ago, I decided that it was time to retire my personal website of over 10 years by replacing it; I have been in the process of designing an entirely new site from the ground up! The new site is here and it is nowhere near ready to be graded because I simply don’t have the proper time to devote to it. I am planning several Easter eggs (hidden sites with little treasures) throughout the site, but finding them will not be easy. On these sites, I’ll post pictures, some of my writings from my vault and other items that will not be accessible to the casual visitor.

My problem in life right now, is that I feel I don’t have a voice or at least one that is audible beyond the gentle air of a soft whisper. Amongst my circle of friends, I guess I’m known as the one who is abrasive, vocal, very opinionated, sex-minded (always have some venue of sex on the mind) and blunt. However, there is another side of me that so few see and during a few iterations throughout my life, I am troubled by this, even though it’s by my own design and self-fortitude. There is more to me than an empty shell but I have seen time and time again in my life that when I do express genuine concern, my petitions often go unheard and ignored. Writing has been the only significant voice I have been able to carry throughout my whole life and although my audience has not reached the standing room only capacity, I dream to someday achieve this.

I stopped writing for plebeian review about 6 years ago, primarily because I needed to focus my faculties more on a greater charge of self-fulfillment. Since making that decision, I have moved at least a dozen times, held a few jobs, had an unsuccessful septoplasty to remove a bone spur, traveled across the country and back, found my partner, gained 30+ pounds, issued a walking cane for when my back goes out, bought a home, discovered I’m going deaf, started school again, lost my brother and his unborn child, lost old friends, made new friends, had Lasik, owned 6 vehicles, lost most of the 30-pound gain, accrued more debt, went into a short-lived business with my cousin, and most recently, elected as president of the board of directors for my condominium association.

The one thing I am very proud of is that in this time, during the past 6 years, I have been able to devote some time to completing my book, which I started in April of 1999. Between all of my obligations, I have so little time to designate to work on my novel and when I do have some free time, I often lack the inspiration or motivation to open up the page and continue pecking away at the keyboard. While the outline has faced some extensive changes over the years, I am now midway through the ninth chapter out of 13, with the latter portions in their near finished state. I simply have not had the time to conduct a full research necessary for this particular part of the story and for my lack of time, the book has yet again been placed on the back burner; I don’t want my masterpiece to suffer for lack of substantiation.

Meanwhile, the world keeps spinning.

Until next time…
NK